I read recently (I forget where – and I have already scalded myself for not saving the link) that every aspiring writer should have an electronic platform namely, a social media presence. (more…)
Admittedly I dropped off the face of the planet, but in my defence I did push a rather large baby out my whatsit 9 weeks ago!
I met a mummy friend today, and she told me she was starting a blog, so I figured I had no excuse as a veteran blogger! So I am officially jumping back on the wagon. It was a fight to dream land with baby black but now he’s down here I am catching up!
I figure the quickest way to update you on the last 9 weeks is through short sharp Facebook statuses – Here is my last 9 weeks in brief:
4/2/14 Had the boy weighed today… 14lb… He’s a stone… A STONE!! Wtf!!
I just want to state for the record 5am is NOT play time
1/2/14 And that is why I deserve a pair of Louboutins!…. And the fact I pushed a baby out my…!
30/1/14 Someone seriously needs to invent breast pads that actually work this is not a good look
29/1/14 8 hours later, several nappies, play gym, bumbo, vibrating rocking chair, several feeds, me covered head to foot in leaked milk, sticky arms, no bath, no pee, inhaled food, practiced sitting, standing and grabbing and finally I managed to tire him out enough for one…. Just one nap…. I am shattered, PLEASE for the love of my sanity stay asleep.
And he’s awake again. Some one actually shoot me.
28/1/14 8 week health check and vaccines… FML
25/1/14 Dear pampers/huggies can you please invent a dry baby wipe that still cleans but isnt cold and wet like the normal wipes, because they ALWAYS wake the baby up in the middle of the night when u need to change them. Thanks
23/1/14 Won’t nap during the day when u want them too… But by god will they fall into an unwakeable coma the minute u want them to be awake!… In other news I’m pretty sure there’s sick on me somewhere the smell of stale cheese is following me and I can’t find where it is!! #fml
21/1/14 So tired today 😦
20/1/14 5000 changes later a gallon of poo, dozens of nappies, half a roll of kitchen towel, several litres of sick, a rather large bogey, two giant pee pees, half a pack of baby wipes, and finally a bath, Atlas is clean, dressed, fed and passing out –
I on the other hand am rather sweaty, covered in several layers of poo, sick and wee, my child’s bogey and oddly macaroni cheese! When is my wife coming home…. — feeling fresh
16/1/14 Apparently these are the same age – UGH no wonder I can’t find anything to fit him 😦
15/1/14 Looking fabulous covered in projectile vomit as I walk into tescos…. Note to self – keep a change of clothes for mummy not just baby in the car!
9/1/14 Hate to have a bitch and moan but how in the hell is this model representative of post birth women? – amazon are idiots
“severe” tummy muscle separation and an average healing time of 5-6months – which means no proper exercise for 5/6months – definitely shedding a tear today — feeling gutted.
Ok that would be the 4th change of clothes… #sigh
Definitely initiated into parenthood this morning – pee and sick on the bed followed by projectile sick on to the floor and three changes of clothes all before I’m dresses and out of my room BUT it’s all ok… You know why…. We have laughter as well as smiles this morning – and that made it all ok again!!
8/1/14 And we have a smiling baby black and it’s not just wind!!
28/12/13 Where has 4 weeks gone? Can’t believe we have been parents for 4 whole weeks already!
25/1/13 CHRISTMAS DAY
Thank you everyone for the love and messages I just got home safe and sound but under strict rest orders and have some heavy duty antibiotics but on the mend
Would really like to go home now — feeling sad.
So for Christmas Santa bought me a stay in hospital, IV antibiotics and some serious abdomen pain merry fudging Christmas everyone! — feelingill.
23/12/13 Officially running on empty — feeling drained.
22/12/13 I now have full appreciation for the need for ‘family cars’ trying to breast feed and nappy change in my car is a full blown FML situation!!
…That priceless moment when ur little bub holds on during a cuddle and u just know u were born to be a mummy/mama/daddy or dada….
21/12/13 Best day ever when u can put pre pregnancy trousers on and they aren’t uncomfortable…! still a long way to go though!!
20/12/13 Find “milk drunk” babies hilarious
15/12/13 Calling all breastfeeding mothers – upon leaving the house post feed – make sure your top is pulled up and ur bra covered particularly when entering supermarkets!
12/12/13 Forget being ambidextrous…. Having babies give you toe and feet dexterity!! I’ll be painting the Mona Lisa with my left toes in no time!!
10/12/13 Advent calendars…. The reason why mummies with Christmas babies know the date!!
6/12/13 Day 1 at home 9:15am everyone’s bathed and dressed and he’s been fed…. Hmm I’m thinking this is the calm before the storm!! :s
I made an executive decision to delete facebook on Tuesday.
At the time I was seriously peeved with it, but now I might be getting some slight withdrawals…!
The thing with facebook, is that technically it really is a good way to stay connected, and it really is a good way of having a back up of all your photos. However, increasingly over the last few months I have been getting irritated with it.
I am prone to ranting, and writing statuses that may or may not be fleeting, I tweet angry tweets, and write angry blogs. However, I am not reaaaallly always angry. I know that it makes me look like I am innately angry, but I just get supremely irritated by things. Once I have ranted, tweeted, status’d or blogged its out of my system and I am over it. I don’t hold grudges, my moods are only temporary and basically everyone should ignore me. Plus, I don’t really mean the things I say most of the time.
That, however, does not stop people putting their two pence in. Now don’t get me wrong I 100% appreciate that if I didn’t write statuses people wouldn’t comment on them. But that’s one of the reasons I deleted it.
I started to feel like people were unnecessarily sticking their ore in. My mother felt the need to comment on literally every single status. If I swore she would say publicly don’t swear sweetie, or Oh is that French. COME ON, I am 25, and married for god sake. I do not need to be told when I can and cannot swear on my facebook.
If I was annoyed at something, or had ranted about something, people would tell me what I should and shouldn’t do.
Now, I know that people comment on blogs, but that’s different. I am asking for comments, I want the comments, I am actively seeking out engagement, and interaction.
Facebook however, I would make some blasé comment about being angry, or raging and people would literally think that I was about to hurt someone, or myself.
When did everyone get so serious? It’s a fricking joke, an off the cuff blasé, momentary feeling for goodness sake. Just because I’m raging at 9:02 doesn’t mean I am still raging at 9:04.
What tipped me over the edge was, I wrote a status about being in the worst mood ever, and of all people to comment on my status, it was one of the last people I saw before meeting my now wife. They wrote some patronizing comment about how I needed to change my outlook on life, I am too angry, it’s not healthy. FUuuuuuuuuCK OFF.
a) you of all people don’t tell me what to do, I haven’t seen this person in 3 and a half years, so what do you know about my life anyway and
b) what the hell makes you think you know me well enough to tell me what to do anyway
c) It’s a fricking status. It doesn’t mean anything. CHILL OUT.
Also, facebook kills peoples sex lives. In fact technology in general kills peoples sex lives. Since when did we become a society that doesn’t communicate any more? Lesbians in general are more in danger of suffering lesbian bed death than other people anyway. So I’ll be damned if I risk it for the sake of fricking facebook.
I did a little friend survey of those in relationships and asked how many of them suffer from that awkward moment when they and their partners crawl into bed at night, and instead of having a cuddle or communicating with their lovers, they prefer to sit on their phones, on facebook or twitter or whatever, in silence. Do you know how many said they did that…..
That is ridiculous.
So I deleted facebook.
I don’t want random school friends that I don’t care about telling me what I should and shouldn’t be doing with my life, and I certainly don’t want to go anywhere near lesbian bed death.
So I am protesting.
I deleted facebook on Tuesday evening.
It’s now Thursday morning, and I think, ironically, I am having withdrawals because I suffered from a horrendous realisation….. I too am nosy, and love to know what people are doing or saying. I don’t however, stick my ore in where it’s not wanted!!
I don’t know yet, how long this angry protest will continue for. Probably not long! But I am holding out thus far!!